Funeral Food

by Freddy Fudd Pucker

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A few words from Billy...........

Freddy & I were on tour in Germany and Belgium in May/June of 2016. When not playing shows, Freddy was driving and Billy was in the passenger seat. And occasionally Matty or Simon were in the back, making conversation or sandwiches. Freddy & I had met previously playing at FEST in Gainesville, Florida and Book Yer Ane Fest in Dundee, Scotland but this was our first string of dates together, and we became fast friends. The days were long, and the nights were longer. But that’s another story.

One day, we were hurtling down the motorway on the way to the next show, talking to each other as quickly as humanly possible, when somehow we got onto the subject of funerals. Freddy said the phrase ‘funeral food,’ and then said it would be a good name for a band. I agreed, and told him in no uncertain terms, that if he didn’t use it, I was going to use it. This is the trouble with hanging out with other creative people all the time. You’re often fighting for ideas. I went so far as to write it down in the notebook I always carry with me.

Then, an idea hit me. ‘Why don’t we each write a song called that this week, and then perform them at the show in Berlin on Saturday?’ I asked Freddy. He looked at me with that dangerous spark he often has in his eye. ‘Deal!’ he shouted, and smacked the steering wheel, almost causing us to fly off the side of the highway into a field.

The next afternoon, we had a short drive to the next show in Kiel. We considered hitting our second water park of the tour (it’s a hard life eh?), before we decided that as it was such a beautiful day, we should find a nice quiet park, head to opposite ends of it with our guitars, and write our songs. So, that is what we did.

Forty minutes later, we’d each written a song, me sitting on a bench, where I watched children play and an old man walk a dog, and a woman eat her lunch on a break from her job, and Freddy sitting cross-legged in the shade under a beautiful tree. We reconvened and played the songs to each other, and we both agreed that it was a pretty special moment.

This release is a recording of those songs, un-tampered with, and un-edited, for better or for worse. This is a statement of a time, and a set of honest, from-the-heart songs. I hope you enjoy them. Thank you for listening.


Billy Liar.
Edinburgh, November 2016.

credits

released November 28, 2016

'Mastered' by Viggy Big-Dick & Ricky Rude-Beef at Forsterstraße Studios, Berlin, 2016.

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Freddy Fudd Pucker Berlin, Germany

Freddy Fudd Pucker is a one-boy-band who plays a form of folk/thrash or something. No two shows are ever the same. EVERYTHING FASTER THAN EVERYTHING ELSE.

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Track Name: Funeral Food
Most people shit themselves when they die
A final humiliation at the end of a humiliating life
What are we gonna do with all of these cheese-rolls?
What are we gonna do with all of these unpaid bills?
These dry cakes and watery soups
Thrown in the trash funeral food
Heart disease, ingrown toenails and postcards from T-shirt destinations
Back to the earth, funeral food.

Nana always said
"Wear clean underpants
You never know when you might get in an accident
The doctor, he might just fall in love."
Love might save the day, but probably not.

Because most people shit themselves when they die
A final humiliation at the end of shitty fucking life
What are we gonna do with all of these egg-salad-sandwiches?
What are we gonna do with all of these wasted chances?
This dry quiche and watery soups, thrown in the trash funeral food
Rugby trophies, photographs and unclean love-heart printed underpants
Back to the earth, funeral food.
Track Name: Funeral Food
I went back to my old hometown
And watched them lower you into the ground
I don't know what you were looking for
But you don't have to look anymore


Do the band still play, if there's no-one at the wake?
Can you tell how much I loved you by the size of the cake?
Caught myself in the mirror, and straightened up my tie
We'd have laughed about the lousy food, if you were still alive


If you were still alive.
I was on tour when they called me on the phone
Are you sitting down? Are you alone?
They said you'd had an episode

They told me that you gave up hope
Do the band still play, if there's no-one at the wake?
Can you tell how much I loved you by the look on my face?
Caught myself in the mirror, and straightened up my tie
We'd have laughed about the lousy food, if you were still alive

I found myself going quiet in the corner of the room
A funeral's a funny way to spend an afternoon
When I left the church your parents didn't understand
Why I couldn't shake them by the hand.